Today on #ListenUpNG, we are discussing RED & WHITE FLAGS! Redflags? ???? #ListenUpNG What are they? @SuperSoulLifter https://t.co/siPJuf4XM2

#ListenUpNG Are you wise enough to recognise them for what they are? Especially in relationships????? @SuperSoulLifter https://t.co/9qQcjo8NK4

Or are you living in self denial and TURNING those REDFLAGS to WHITE? #ListenUpNG @SuperSoulLifter https://t.co/6OW2JUl9i4

And now, I welcome Eniola @SuperSoulLifter on board #ListenUpNG Wk43. It’s an honour having you! Over to you! https://t.co/MfONV82qa1

1) Thank you for having me @KemiOdutayo Its great being on your platform to share some insights…#ListenUpNG

2) Signs are what we refer to as flags and they may come in red and white…#ListenUpNG

3) If you pay close attention, Signs will show you two things:1) Who a person is and 2) why you attract such a person #ListenUpNG

4) Flags(signs) are there to save you from latter pain… #ListenUpNG

5) Signs are there to help you think before you choose. Don’t just believe a relationship will work out but ignore the signs…#ListenUpNG

6) Road signs were built for direction to KNOW where to turn to,stop or move on same with relationships,flags are for direction#ListenUpNG

7) WARNING: The signs/flags you ignore or paint white today, you may weep over tomorrow #ListenUpNG

8) Three things will make you paint a red flag white. 1) Desperation 2) Comparison with other people 3) Pressure to get married #ListenUpNG

9) An excessive desperation to be in a relationship will make you paint the red flags white #ListenUpNG

10) DESPERATION is the TOP reason why you may paint a red flag white…and this leads to all forms of MANIPULATION #ListenUpNG

11) Manipulation makes you seek wrong ways to make a person fit into your life or to be in a person’s life #ListenUpNG

12) Here is what you should THINK THROUGH: If they were right for you, why would you seek ways to make them fit?.#ListenUpNG

13) Avoid using manipulation(spell casting,voodoo,seduction) to get a partner. Truth is, You will reap what you sow #ListenUpNG

14) Comparison is another reason for painting red flags white.. #ListenUpNG

15) Comparison works will have you go any length just to have a “social media type of relationship* #ListenUpNG

16) The moment you say to yourself “I will change him/her”, expect the worst in marriage. That’s already a sign it won’t work#ListenUpNG

17) The moment u start to compromise ur core values so that someone can fit into your life,then u may be headed for trouble&tears#ListenupNG

18) Ex. of Red Flags- If someone wanted to be in your life, you wouldn’t have to beg them to call, text or marry you #ListenUpNG

19) Don’t take up the task of a savior in a person’s life. If someone needs to change they will without force #ListenUpNG

20) If a person you meet needs to grow give them the time to & if you have NO time to waste, move on…#ListenUpNG

21) However, With the availability of CHRIST, your work as a SAVIOR is invalid& unnecessary. #ListenUpNG

22) Except you were called into someone’s life for a purpose like Hosea (Hosea 1:2). God told Hosea “Go and Marry a prostitute” #ListenUpNG

23a) Except God told you( NOT your feelings, desperation or your pastor or anyone), .contd #ListenUpNG

23b) Except God did, don’t take up the responsibility of being in someone’s life to change them or save them..#ListenUpNG

24) God WON’T take the blame for the negative outcome of a sign u asked him to show u but failed to take note of or ignored#ListenUpNG

25) When the flag is red enough, it would be a waste of time seeking for spiritual revelation where common sense is needed #ListenUpNG

26) If he hits you while dating you should expect the same in marriage, if she messes around now expect same in marriage #ListeupNG

27) Face reality: Again, People rarely change except they want to #ListenupNG

28) Stop ignoring the reality of a person while dating and then get into marriage hoping for a miracle.Warning! #ListenUpN

29) You are NOT assured that a person will change in marriage that’s the essence of signs/ red flags in relationship.#ListenUpNG

30) So you would only be shortchanging yourself by turning the RED FLAGS to WHITE #ListenUpNG

31) Warning! Don’t be carried away with the feelings,butterflies and emotions that you ignore the red flags. #ListenUpNG

32) Discernment means ” God’s “spirit” in you helping you to see what your eyes cannot see about someone #ListenUpNG

33) Ask God: “What do I need to Know about this person?” #ListenUpNG

34) The answer will be downloaded to your spirit or revealed to you…#ListenUpNG

34b) Then the ball is in your court. YOU THEN CHOOSE if you want them or not. #ListenUpNG

35) God won’t choose for you but He will lead you because there is a divine gift of CHOICE #ListenUpNG

35b) Side note: “If you do NOT believe God exists,that you are here is already a proof that He does.. #ListenUpNG

36) Moving on, When you ask God to order your steps or direct your path, make sure you follow His lead. #ListenUpNG

37) Most turbulent marriages are products of ignored red flags.#ListenUpNG

38) Sometimes the red flags are HIDDEN becus one person has an ulterior motive and that’s where discernment is needed. #ListenUpNG

39) It is important to get things right from the start.Don’t end up in a situation where you wish u cld go back and change things.#ListenUpNG

40) Instead of ignoring a sign or painting red flag white, ask yourself “Can I deal with this when married? #ListenUpNG

41) When someone recommends someone to you,remember YOU (NOT THEM) will have to live with them&the consequences of your choice #ListenUpNG

42) My prayer for you: ” I pray you get it.I pray a light shines in your heart to brighten your perspective. #ListenUpNG

43) I pray you understand that marriage is a serious thing to God.#ListenUpNG

44) I pray you see that it breaks God’s heart to see that its failing due to man’s ignorance& inability to ASK for knowledge#ListenUpNG

45) Thank YOU for having me. My name is Eniola Ake. I’m a Relationship student(not expert),a growing wife&Mom… #ListenUpNG

About Kemi Odutayo

‘Kemi Odutayo, a graduate of University of Lagos, Nigeria is a Practitioner of NLP, a blogger, an author, a counselor and a media consultant. She is the Head of Operations, Me4 Communications, a publishing, marketing and communications outfit specializing in publishing books/eBooks, managing and offering training for social media accounts for individuals and organizations. Kemi and her husband of many years, Kayode Odutayo have a beautiful family blessed with three lovely children.