#ListenUpNG Wk8: Help! His BABY MAMA is still in the picture!

Hello friends! Welcome to another thought provoking session of #ListenUp. This session is specially dedicated to SINGLES and all uncles and aunties who love them! Lol!
Click this link for the #Storify story(with tweets and images)
Or #ReadRestRelaxAndReflect on the compiled tweets below.
Our Special Guest TODAY is @Grace_Festus , a Relationship Expert and Host #HealthyRelationship on @Praiseworld_
#ListenUp Ladies and Gentlemen, join me to welcome @Grace_Festus . You are welcome!
1. Welcome to #ListenUp. Today’s session is for singles. I’ll be sharing on ‘Help! His baby mama is still in the picture’.
2. Permit me to illustrate this title with some characters #ListenUp. Many thanks to @Kemi_Odutayo for this platform
3. Tonye & Tutu are in love. They believe they are soul mates and walking down the aisle soon #ListenUp
4. It was while they were planning the wedding that Tonye opened up to Tutu that he has a son outside wedlock #ListenUp
5. He opened up that his ‘supposed’ cousin Tolu is his ex & mother of his child #ListenUp
6. Tutu had known Tolu for a while with her son Timothy. It came as a rude shock to know her fiancé is the father to the child #ListenUp
7. Tutu needs answers to a lot of questions. Tonye needs counsel on making the right decision #ListenUp
8. Tonye, it is understandable that you don’t have to marry Tolu because of the child; marry for love #ListenUp
9. Since you have made up your mind to marry Tolu, you need to make her feel secure #ListenUp
10. It takes a woman with a large heart and great love to accept to marry a man who has a child with another woman (baby mama) #ListenUp
11. If she eventually agrees to marry you, value her, celebrate her and hide nothing from her.  #ListenUp
12. Hiding nothing from her also means carrying her along in your financial responsibility to your child #ListenUp
13. It may not be easy, but if you want peace; transparency is key. Make your baby mama know her space & not to cross the line #ListenUp
14. Don’t let your baby mama tie you die emotionally with the excuse of your child. Women are good at this. Take caution #ListenUp
15. Know when to draw the line with your baby mama; you may conclude to having your child live with you #ListenUp
16. However you need to cooperation of your bride to be if your child has to live with you #ListenUp
17. You both may decide to have your child come around once a while, bi-monthly, every weekend or as convenient for all parties #ListenUp
18. When I say all parties, your bride to be is very important and a significant part of these parties #ListenUp
19. You wouldn’t want to live a sad life. If your bride is not happy with your arrangement, you may not enjoy your marriage to her #ListenUp
20. For you to want to take a bride apart from your baby mama means it is emotionally & romantically over between you &  your baby mama #ListenUp
21. Now let me talk to the bride to be (The ‘Tutu’ in this scenario). Single ladies I need you to #ListenUp
22. If you love him so much that you have decided to marry him despite his baby and his baby mama; you are a courageous woman #ListenUp
23. That means you have weighed your love for him and known for sure that it is strong enough to cater for d responsibilities 1/2 #ListenUp
23 (b)… you are about to carry #ListenUp
24. …Responsibilities because you are going to be a step mum to your hubby’s child once you say ‘Yes I do’ to that man #ListenUp
25. You are a step mum whether the child lives under same roof with you or not. So brace up #ListenUp
26. Your unconditional love to the child will be required, so it is responsibility ma’am! #ListenUp
27. The child may probably wanna compare you with his/her mum in all ways so be ready for this #ListenUp
28. I hope you know, this child will remain your hubby’s first born. I hope you have accepted that in good faith #ListenUp
29. Your hubby will sometimes need some daddy-child time with his child alone without your interference. Be prepared for this #ListenUp
30. My aim is not to get you scared but to prepare you ahead for the future. It is for you to know if you are ready for it or not #ListenUp
31. My lady, if he loves you enough to tell you about his past and he is sincere enough to let go of it for you…1/2 #ListenUp
31 (b)… go for it if you have the strength #ListenUp
32. Lot of people will advice you for or against that relationship but the decision to move on with it lays solely with you #ListenUp
33. It is your life girl; no one will live it for you. You need to be sure to know if your man is thru with his baby mama or not #ListenUp
34. If you are rest assured that he is no more into her and he is fully into you now; go for it if it makes you happy #ListenUp
35. Love with your heart but don’t let your brain go to sleep. Be observant, be vigilant be prayerful #ListenUp
36. Go for pre-marital counselling when you decide to settle down. It will do you a lot of good #ListenUp
37. A great woman nurtures her children for greatness; be prepared to do so to your hubby’s child #Listenup
38. A piece for the baby mama>> you can’t tie a man down with the child you have for him. #ListenUp
39. If you have his child and yet he shows up with another woman he wants to marry, that means he is not into you #ListenUp
40. That is why I strongly advise to stay off sex when you’re still single. Sleep alone till you get married LOL 1/2  #ListenUp
40 (b) That’s God candid advice for singles #ListenUp
41. If sex is a sign of love why do prostitute sleep with any man for money? #ListenUp
42. You may be a baby mama today. Carry yourself with dignity & retrace your steps. There is a man who will desire U for who U are #ListenUp
43. Everyone has a past, so also everyone has a bright future. Dust your past;  imbibe honesty & integrity #ListenUp
Many thanks to my Sis and partner in ministry for this platform. God bless you @kemi_odutayo for #ListenUp. Love you loads.
Hmmm. Yet another thought provoking session especially for our SINGLES. In summary, guys, zip up! And ladies, don’t sell yourself short! The only way sex can be safe is within the context of marriage.
To any Single that finds him/herself in this situation, your whole life is still in front of you! Retrace your steps, trust in God and give your life to Him. He is a merciful God; a God of many chances. And immediately He brings that lady or guy your way, don’t keep your child a secret!
Let’s hook up again next week Friday by 4pm on TWITTER. We will be discussing PASSWORDING; the ‘myth’ of your communications gadgets being your exclusive property especially if you are married!

About Kemi Odutayo

‘Kemi Odutayo, a graduate of University of Lagos, Nigeria is a Practitioner of NLP, a blogger, an author, a counselor and a media consultant. She is the Head of Operations, Me4 Communications, a publishing, marketing and communications outfit specializing in publishing books/eBooks, managing and offering training for social media accounts for individuals and organizations. Kemi and her husband of many years, Kayode Odutayo have a beautiful family blessed with three lovely children.